The Card I Have Carried For 28 Years

There is a business card in my wallet that I have carried since 1998. The edges are worn, but the name is still clear: Norman Jensen.

I met Norman in the early hours of a Saturday morning at Abidjan airport. I was stranded, and he came to my assistance.

I’d been running a Seven Habits of Highly Effective People workshop in Douala, Cameroon, and was travelling home to Johannesburg via Lagos and Abidjan. Storms had delayed our arrival. On our first approach into Abidjan, the rain was so heavy that the pilot abandoned the landing.

As we came down a second time, I could see the South African Airways aircraft taxiing out for Johannesburg.

My flight home was leaving without me.

I had no US dollars, nowhere to stay and no arrangements for a weekend in the Ivory Coast. There was political tension in the country, and I found the atmosphere at the airport intimidating.

I remember standing there, bewildered, wondering what to do.

That was when Norman approached me. He could see I was in trouble. I remember him saying, “Come and stay with us. We’re going to help you.”

Norman worked in commercial diving and was living on a boat outside Abidjan harbour. We drove through the city in the early hours. I was anxious and wary of my surroundings, but someone was helping me.

I had somewhere to go.

Over that weekend, he gave me a place to stay and helped me find a way home. We visited the huge fish market and when I finally was able to rebook my flight, he paid for it.

The Marché aux Poissons – Abidjan, Ivory Coast

Then, via satellite phone, I heard that my dearly beloved grandfather had passed away. It was painful news to receive so far from home. Norman offered consolation at a time when it was sorely needed.

We had been strangers.

Yet Norman noticed my distress and he acted on it. His kindness and generosity brought relief, safety and companionship when I felt isolated and alone.

I’ve thought about that weekend so many times since.

It taught me something I have never forgotten: when you feel vulnerable, asking for help can be difficult. You may not know whom to ask, or even what to ask for. Norman noticed before I had found the words. He helped me when I did not know how to help myself.

It also taught me how practical kindness can be.

His concern came with an invitation, a bed and a flight home. He took away problems I could not see how to solve.

As leaders and managers we spend so much of our time focused on plans, performance and getting things done.

Yet all of these involve people.

People whose difficulties may be easy to miss. A colleague who seems distracted. Someone struggling to ask for help. A person facing circumstances we know nothing about.

Paying attention gives us a chance to respond.

Sometimes that means listening. Sometimes it means offering reassurance and support. Sometimes it means doing something practical that helps someone through the day.

Norman could not have known what his kindness would mean to me.

Twenty-eight years later, his card is still in my wallet. I carry it with me wherever I go. I remain deeply grateful to this complete stranger whose kindness, generosity and empathy I will never forget.

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